


Waiting for a Miracle to Come

by The_Marron



Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Canon Compliant, Internalized Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-30 02:48:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19843990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Marron/pseuds/The_Marron
Summary: Right before announcing his decision, Eduardo shot a look at Jaime, who was standing right next to him. Jaime’s hurt expression while looking at Virgil and Bart spoke enough.But Eduardo was not going to give up.Because unlike Jaime, he had courage to love Bart Allen.SPOILER TO 3x018 Early Warning





	Waiting for a Miracle to Come

Eduardo didn’t want to be _that_ guy, but seriously, sometimes it was too much. Everything was too much, being a constant support to the kids at the centre, being a good son, being a meta-human in the society that wanted the metahumans to be either gods or gone, being so close to the young heroes.

Sometimes, in the middle of the night, his mind came back to these past two years, trying to somehow figure out what his role was in this whole mess.

He remembered his anger, his disappointment with everything and everyone, he remembered being scared of his own powers, of himself. He still remembered how he, Tye and Asami followed Arsenal, not willing to deal with Nightwing’s authoritative tone. They roamed around for a while, sometimes helping people, sometimes stealing from one of many Arrowcaves to survive.

But Arsenal’s perpetual anger and Tye and Asami’s blooming romance quickly made Eduardo wish for something else. Stability, peace, maybe? But at the same time, he wanted to help. He had seen the way he could help, save lives, true, but while laying in some abandoned house with the rest of his companions, he thought about his father’s words. And how much it would have changed if he had ever met someone his age to guide him through the changes, to help him with his abilities… They got Lex Luthor instead, who wanted them to become his personal specials ops. How many more Lex Luthors could be there, waiting to get their hands on meta-kids just to use them, to force them into doing things they were not comfortable with, just because the kids had no one else to turn to.

So, one day Eduardo simply said his goodbyes to Arsenal, Tye and Asami and came back come. Mending his relationship with Eduardo Dorado senior took a while, but working with other teenagers at the meta-center helped. He was young, and he was still learning, so he didn’t have all the answers, but he could see that sometimes all these other kids needed, was understanding. Sympathy. Trust. Assurance that they were not alone.

Although the Meta-human center was mostly a civilian facility, the Leaguers sometimes popped in, to talk to the kids, to inspire them a bit. It didn’t work too well, the teens were cowered in the presence of the full-time heroes, so after a while, it was Nightwing’s teammates that started to appear.

The Team, as they used to call themselves still sometimes irritated him. Miss Martian with her holier-than-thou shtick, Superboy with his anger issues, Wonder Girl and her loud voice that kept everyone on their toes… It took him a while to see past first impressions and to see these people as more than just a bunch of losers that did everything the grown-ups told them to. Even Bart used to irritate him.

Eduardo remembered that boy who seemed like a little satellite to the Blue Beetle from the corridor where they were all waiting for the talk with Black Canary. For a long time, Eduardo forgot about his existence entirely, but he never forgot the Blue Beetle. There was something wrong with him then, and Eduardo remembered not trusting Tye at all when he tried to convince them that this was his best friends, that he was cool and good. Of course, they all learned later about the Reach brainwashing and how Jaime was saved from it by the Team, but some level of distrust still remained within Eduardo.

And as Blue Beetle and Kid Flash continued to appear at the Centre, Eduardo tried to make himself like Jaime too. It didn’t work at the beginning. Eduardo knew everything about being rejected by someone important to you and from what he could see, Kid Flash followed his friend everywhere, with his boundless energy, with his lame jokes and speed shenanigans, and the Blue Beetle simply tolerated it. He escaped physical contact, hugs and pats on the shoulder Bart seemed to need, he kept Bart at a distance, while still talking to him, shaking his head at the boy’s jokes and silencing him quite often.

This was what drew Eduardo towards Bart in the first place, this compassion. It was clear that Beetle and Kid Flash were friends, but there was no balance in this friendship. Blue Beetle’s response to Bart was lukewarm at best and one day, Eduardo decided to talk to Bart about it. He was a teenage counselor, after all.

“Hey, Bart…” He said one day, disturbing Jaime and Bart as they were setting up the Christmas tree. “Can I talk to you for a bit?”

“Sure!”

The speedster didn’t even look that surprised, he simply smiled and in seconds he was standing right next to Eduardo, his green eyes sparkling and Eduardo felt nervous all of a sudden. He gestured Bart to follow him outside, trying to find a spot out of scarab’s reach, so that their talk would remain private. He was aware of Jaime’s eyes trailing after them, but decided to ignore it for now.

When they were on the parking lot of the centre, Eduardo finally stopped. He turned to Bart and tried to collect his thoughts, while the speedster talked at him about some food or other.

“Bart, stop, please.” There was something worrying about a silent Bart Allen. It should have been obvious, Eduardo realized, Bart was always talking and always moving precisely because a silent Bart was an entirely different creature than the bouncy one. This Bart had seen the Apocalypse, he had seen Blue Beetle kill his family, he had survived so much that his eyes were no longer the eyes of a teenager. They were the eyes of a veteran. Suddenly, Eduardo felt a bit underprepared for the talk he tried to have. But still, he had to do this.

“Bart, do you know what friendship is?”

“Of course, it’s when you have your best pal, your best man in the world with whom you share adventures and you go on missions together, and you hang out every week and you basically are each other’s companions, isn’t it?” Bart replied, his energy back and his smile fixed on his face.

“Yes, you are right, of course, but… There is something more to it. It’s the feeling of support from both sides. It’s trust that not only the other person can tell you their problems, but that you can rely on them too. That they will find you when you disappear, they will know when you are sad and they will care for you as much as you care for them.” Eduardo replies, trying to put into words everything he experienced and everything he noticed was missing from the Blue Beetle/Kid Flash duo. He just hoped that Bart would not get offended.

“Hey, I know that! It’s exactly the way me and Blue are, we are…” But Eduardo was ready for that.

“You are not, Bart. I’m sorry, but you really are not. You are close, I’ll give you that, but you seem much more involved in this friendship than Jaime is. You start the contact, you come to him every time, and I know you were aware of that. You do it on purpose, as if you were afraid he would forget you the moment he doesn’t see you. Why?”

Bart simply stared at him, silent once again.

“It’s your life, of course, but you deserve a true friend, not a ward you need to take care of. I’m not saying you should stop being friends with him, far from it, but maybe you should talk to him about why he keeps you at the arm’s length.”

“I know why.” That surprised Eduardo. But then again, Bart had always been much more than his carefree smile suggested, as it seemed.

“I’m a living, breathing reminder of the future he wanted to escape from. Of a future that almost were. I still carry scars from other Blue Beetle’s blades, and he still remembers how eager the scarab was to kill me while Jaime was put on the mode. No wonder he escapes from me, it’s a miracle he still tolerates me, with everything he knows, everything he lived through. So do not assume cold-heartedness on Jaime’s part, not in my presence.” Bart replied, his tone angry and hurt and Eduardo’s heart panged with guilt.

“And what about you? Who is there for you, when you see Blue Beetle swooping in from the sky, taking his enemies apart? Who is there to listen to your part of the story? Would you tell Jaime everything?” He pressed on, trying to somehow reach the boy in front of him, to let him know that he too, deserves to be heard, to be supported.

“I’m okay, though.” Bart said, beaming and Eduardo was once again taken aback by how genuine the smile looked.

“Alright. It’s your life, your choice. I guess what I was trying to say was… You can always talk to me, you know? I know, we don’t know each other all that well, but I am here if you need me, and I’m willing to listen, okay?”

Bart just gave him a long, confused look which was replaced with a relaxed smile.

“Great. So now that the hard talk is behind us, you probably want to take me somewhere to eat? You know, it’s in Speedster Care 101, after heart-t-heart you should feed your speedster, otherwise their brain cells start to die!”Bart announced and Eduardo smiled, hoping that maybe, just maybe, he had made a difference after all.

They came back to the assembly hall to join Jaime, whose mood dropped down significantly while they were gone. Still, he stopped sulking when Bart told him that it was time to get some food. Eduardo went with them, trying to see if Bart was right. Was there some hidden trauma in Blue Beetle’s actions?

He had seen none.

What he had seen was that Bart’s attention and his happiness seemed to revolve around Jaime’s mere presence and for some reason, it made Eduardo sad.

*

Still, after their talk Bart started to appear at the Centre more, and sometimes without Jaime in a tow.

He looked a bit worse to wear, but refused to share with Eduardo, dragging him instead to the movies, to strange restaurants he had found in Taos, and on one memorable occasion to the bowling alley where he proceeded to mess up all of his throws because he had problems with adjusting his speed. It was fun to be with Bart, Eduardo realized, and he was more than happy that he actually talked to the speedster all those months ago. Even though he skyped with Tye and Asami from time to time, he could use a friend he could actually meet up with.

If he could call him a friend, really.

Bart still refused to talk about anything personal, but he seemed to enjoy Eduardo’s presence and he shared with him different shenanigans of the team.

Eduardo wanted to ask about Jaime, why he stopped coming to the Centre and why Bart still mentioned him often, but didn’t bring him with to Taos.

The answer came with Traci.

Jaime had a girlfriend now, Eduardo learned as the whole team came to help the newly rescued kids settle in. Miss Martian tried her best, but she couldn’t relate to every single new power that manifested within the teens, so she brought in the reinforcements. And although they were all suited up, it was hard to miss the way Blue Beetle and Thirteen held hands. Bart was trailing behind them, but not talking, just, standing in their presence.

Bart’s numerous visits started to make sense.

When the counseling part was done and there was a bit of chaos as the teens chose which of the heroes they wanted to talk to, ask about their powers, Eduardo patiently waited for Bart to finish his talk with a girl that could pass through the walls. The Speedster was really great with others, his stories entertaining, but helpful at the same time. The girl left him still laughing and promising to bring Bart Eduardo Senior’s mint drops which he kept in his office.

“Hey, Bart.”

“Mi amigo, I’m so delighted to see you!” Bart exclaimed happily and ran to Eduardo, hugging him as if this was normal, as if it was something they have done before. Still, Eduardo eased off into the hug and only when he enveloped Bart in his arms, he realized the speedster was trembling slightly.

He wasn’t crying, not really, but Eduardo held him close all the same. Bart needed the hug, he needed support and he went to Eduardo to get it, and that meant something. That meant a lot.

He wanted to believe that this was because of the kids, but considering his last talk with Bart, he was pretty sure that this wasn’t the case. Bart was heart-broken. And oh, how it made sense in retrospect. He never suspected Bart was in love with Jaime, their relationship never really moved from friendship territory, not from what he could see.

And now Jaime had a girlfriend.

So Eduardo kept him in his embrace, trying to show him that he was not alone, that he wasn’t friendless. That there was someone who understood.

As he held the speedster, there was something nagging at him, as if he was being observed. When he looked up, he was met with Blue Beetle’s glare.

Eduardo didn’t know if it was Jaime or the scarab glaring at him and he didn’t care. Traci was still holding Blue Beetle’s hand so it really wasn’t his place to glare at anyone.

This evening, Bart stayed at Eduardo’s room in the centre and they were half-way through watching Star Wars episode VII, when Bart finally broke the silence.

“They made it official this morning. I mean, I knew they were gravitating towards each other, and I knew they were perfect for each other, but… It still shocked me, I don’t know why,”

“Did you tell him about your feelings?”

Bart looked up at him, his green eyes betraying his youth, for the first time in so many months.

“No, never. I am an abomination from different time and space at this point. I have no business running around present and butting into other people’s romances. I am an extra here, I am not meant to be in this era. Traci is for Jaime, at least for now. Maybe later there would be someone else, maybe not, but I always knew it wasn’t going to be me.”

“Why not? Your timeline is not ours, there is a place for you here.”

Bart gave him a sad look.

“Is there? I took Wally’s place, Ed. I wasn’t meant to be here and yet here I am, and Wally is not. I do not want to mess anything else up. Not for them. Not for Jaime.”

Eduardo pulled him into a hug and Bart seemed surprised at somebody else initiating the contact, but he settled into it, his chin resting in Eduardo’s shoulder. He deserved this, they both did.

*

The main reason why Eduardo had run away from home all these years ago was not only his powers, it was because he realized he wasn’t what his father wanted him to be. He wasn’t a math genius, he wasn’t patient ad most of all, he wasn’t straight. It took awhile to make his father understand this, but when he finally did, he accepted it, saying that he prefers a gay son than to no son at all. It wasn’t ideal, but it was a start.

So, he knew he was into men for a while, and yet it took him months to realize that his interest in Bart was far from platonic. That his heart skipping a bit whenever they hugged was more than just joy at the contact. That his anger at Jaime, though occasional, was jealousy, not necessarily fear of the Blue Beetle.

Eduardo was in love with Bart Allen and suddenly life became even more complicated.

Because Bart’s way of coping with unrequited feelings was to be everyone’s friend. He didn’t only hug Eduardo, he also hugged Jaime, Traci, Gar, everyone on the team. He was outright flirty at the times and Eduardo had to wonder if he was doing it on purpose or if it was a part of natural Allen charm. Whatever that was, it drove Eduardo a bit mad. Because he wanted Bart to look at him in the way he still looked at Jaime. With unbidden affection, with joy, with love. Like he was special.

Jaime confused Eduardo, to be quite honest. Now that he finally got a girlfriend, he became much more tactile with Bart. He returned his hugs and little touches, he invited Bart on his dates with Traci and Bart usually shared the details with Eduardo – their dates included mostly watching movies, sitting in one room with all three of them reading something different and talking to each other from time to time.

Eduardo knew all about gay panic and frankly, Jaime’s behavior started to look like one. He was afraid of touching Bart while he was single, because that was gay and wrong, but the moment he got a girlfriend, the moment he was assured of his sexuality, all bets were off. Eduardo hated it, even though he couldn’t really hate Jaime. Jaime was a good guy, he was kind, if a bit awkward and he cared about people deeply. He and Traci were a good fit, her bubbly energy complimenting Jaime’s calm demeanor. Bart liked her and she liked Bart, but from Eduardo could see, sometimes she too, had a worried look in her eyes, when she looked at Bart and Jaime together.

Especially after Thanksgiving.

Teenagers, really.

What Eduardo would give not to be a part of this drama. But he was, because Bart was worth it.

He was definitely worth it.

*

Joan Garrick’s funeral was an awful affair.

Bart wasn’t even trying to act as if it didn’t affect him. This was a second member of the Flash family they have lost in two years and it took its toll on everyone. The Flash and his family were standing there, next to Bart, Barry’s hand’s on the boy shoulders, trying to support him. Bart wasn’t crying, he was too used to losing people, it seemed, but he still looked fragile and hurt. Him and Jay had only each other now, the house they shared suddenly quiet without Joan and her loud laughter.

Eduardo was sure he would come to the funeral the moment Bart told him about Joan’s death. Bart needed someone to be there for him and really, Eduardo had decided to be that person a long time ago.

What he didn’t expect was to Jaime to be there too. He supposedly liked Joan a lot, but it was clear he came here for Bart. It was touching, really. Except for that little moment when Jaime put his arms around Bart, as if this was something they did constantly, and whispered something to him that made Bart smile bit, even though his eyes remained empty.

It hurt to look at them, at these two confusing men who were eternally together and yet forever apart and for a second, Eduardo felt there was no place for him in this relationship. It was confusing, full of hurt, but so strong…

But then, Bart turned to him and approached him to thank him for coming here, for being with him, for being such a good friend and Eduardo’s heart melted.

He could wait a bit.

He would wait for Bart to see him as more than just a friend.

*

Looking at Bart hugging Virgil out of the blue was the final straw. He wanted to do something for the teens back at the centre, true and he had considered joining the Outsiders for a while, because it was his duty, it was something he was able to do, but watching Bart with others, with Jaime, was something that he no longer wanted to do. Why should he sit at home, watching their missions, worrying about every time they touch, when he could join them? Be with Bart, be the one Bart reaches to when he needs help, both as a teammate and as a person.

They worked together nicely during the Onslaught attack on Thanksgiving, they would work well together still.

Right before announcing his decision, Eduardo shot a look at Jaime, who was standing right next to him. Jaime’s hurt expression while looking at Virgil and Bart spoke enough.

But Eduardo was not going to give up.

Because unlike Jaime, he had courage to love Bart Allen.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Leonard Cohen's song 'Waiting for a Miracle'
> 
> I am a big Bluepulse shipper, but I do know when the battle is lost, so I'm trying to somehow convince myself that Bart/Eduardo is cool too. Hence the open ending, you can choose which ship prevails. I don't think we will get any answers from the show itself, the creators are too busy destroying everything in sight with their strange decisions (Will & Artemis???), so yeah, this is therapy piece, in a way.


End file.
